Every Thursday, 7IS Contributor Ryan Henning will take a look at a rumor burning up the hot stove. You may not think it’s important, but it must be important to someone.

That is Matt Kemp. He may be the coolest dude in Los Angeles. Just look at him, with his hat backwards, sitting in the chair backwards. Totally rad. Undoubtedly, the face the Dodgers want to put forward to the kids in LA, or as they prefer to be called, the Kidz. Great marketing. Anyways, the Dodgers want to lock Kemp up long term, and Kemp is saying no thank you, as Ken Gurnick states in the peculiarly titled “Hot Stove Report”. Sounds like a rip off of the Hot Stahoviak to me. I’m on to you, Gurnick.

Personal vendettas aside, what does the whole Kemp/Dodgers to do mean?

- With Juan Pierre gone, the Dodgers are looking for another overpaid, undeperforming outfielder to fill his shoes. Not able to find one on the open market, they will instead seek to pay someone already on the roster triple their worth, while asking him to stop hitting the ball so damn well.

- If Kemp does decide to go long term, however, he will almost decidedly become terrible. As Gurnick points out, the past players to accept deals like this were Paul Lo Duca, Cesar Izturis and Eric Gagne. Yikes. Kemp may be wise to decline.

- If Kemp is the fuure of the Dodgers, then what of Manny Ramirez?  Oh right, retirement. And a straight jacket.

- Kemp’s reluctance to sign a long term deal makes him… just like every single player who has ever played the game, with the exception of about 2-3 players per franchise. I have just wasted my time with this entire post.

Happy New Year, everyone!